Oh, How Time Flies {David Day}

I can't believe it's been 4 years.

Four years since I pined for a baby to love and care for.  Since I longed to be a mommy.

Four years since I first met that sweet baby.  Since we met eyes for the first time and I held his chubby little baby body in my arms.  It felt so good and so right to wrap my arms around him.

Four years since we brought that precious boy to our home.  His home.  Since we bought a crib and clothes and pacifiers and bottles and everything we thought we needed for our new little bundle. 

Four years since mommy and daddy woke up several times each night to bottle feed a hungry little baby.  Since we rocked a fussy infant and gave him all the love we could muster.  And then some.

Four years since the first bath in his new home.  Four years since his first smile in his new home.  Four years since we first cuddled and slept beside each other.

Four years....

And now, we have an energetic, percocious 4 year old.  And more memories to be made....

  

Home just a few days.  About 4 months old

Adoption Day!  2 years old

Everyday misadventures.  4 years old

Thank you God for this blessing I call my son.

When Shopping Trips Go Bad

I use to pride myself on having a good shopper.  My kid has always been a champ at rolling the aisles or racks in a cart or stroller.  Of course, there were the occasional grabs from the shelves or pulls of the clothes racks, but all in all, he rocked at shopping.  A real mother's dream I tell ya!

Until.  Now.

Perhaps with age (his being a little over 4) comes wisdom, but as of late, shopping has not been fun with this little charmer.  Let me re-phrase that, it's been torture.  He's smart enough to know that he can really rock momma's world if he disrupts the shopping.  It's button-pushing at it's finest, folks.  

This was the high point of our Target trip.

If he's not throwing a temper tantrum, he's throwing stuff out of the cart, or kicking me, or wanting to get out of the cart, or standing up in the cart, or screaming to be held, or hitting customers as we roll by, or saying he needs to potty right in the middle of grocery shopping after we've already made one trip to the restroom.  Ugh.

I know some of you can relate.  And, I hope this is just a phase and it ends.  Soon.  I can't take much more.  A girl's gotta eat and have clothes, so no shopping is out of the question.  And, almost as much of a nightmare as shopping with Crazy Preschooler! 

To My Son on His Birthday

My dear sweet David, I will always love your birthday because it marks the day you entered this world. I wasn't there when you took your first breath, but I prayed for you. I didn't get to change your first diaper, but I wanted you. I didn't get to take you home just days old, but God had a plan for me to be your mommy. You see, your birthday is not just a special day for you, it is also my day. It is the day I got to be your mommy. It is the day that you would forever be mine. It would be the day that all my dreams came true. You changed everything for me. Some moments have been hard and some I wish had never ended. Every good and bad and every moment in between have been worth it all. I thank God for you and for making me your mommy. You will always be my baby....

Happy 4th birthday my sweet boy!

Inquiring {Toddler} Minds and a Prayer Request

So I read recently that a toddler asks an average of 437 questions a day.  If this is true, and I am sure it is because I read it on the internet, my kid is above average.  Waaaay above average.  I think he is able to be such an overachiever mostly beacuse he likes to ask the same question more than once.  Like nineteen more times.

Here is an example of what I hear....

"Where's Daddy?"

"Am I going to school today"

"Is the bus picking me up?"

"Can I have a snack?"

"Can I watch Calliou?"

"Can you start it from the beginning?"

"Can you get me dressed now?"

"Where are you going?"

"Are you done?"

"Is is time to go now?"

"When is Daddy going to be home?"

"What time are you picking me up?"

Mulitply each of those questions by about 20, and we have covered the first half hour of my day.  To say he's curious and inquisitive is an understatement.



Now it's my turn to inquire of you...

I am asking for prayer for my friend Lara.  She kissed her two little baby dolls goodbye for a little while as she departed on a flight for Uganda this morning.  She and her husband are traveling there to bring home her third babydoll, a precious boy they are adopting from a Ugandan orphange.  I am asking for prayer for Lara and Jon as they travel across the world, for their two children being cared for by loving grandparents here in the U.S., and for their soon to be third child, A.  If you are mom, you can imagine how difficult it is to leave your babies.  As she follows God's calling, Lara is clinging to these words from Matthew 10:37-38....

Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.

You can read more about Lara's righteous and radical journey here.  Please lift this family up in prayer.

Potty Training Makes Me Cry

source

I feel like I've been potty training for a year.  Actually, I think it has really been that long. 

My guy is turning 4yo in a couple of months and I just felt this pressure to have him potty trained by his birthday.  Tired of buying pull-ups and thinking underwear would be the push he needed to do this thing, I went cold turkey...underwear all day, pull-ups only at night.  I bought a bunch of undies and some cheap (only $4 at Old Navy!) elastic waist, easy-on/easy-off shorts and I was good to go!  David knew how to use the toliet, plus he had a little potty that we kept in the family room.  Now it was getting him to use either one.  On his own.  Without us making him to do it. 

We were 2 weeks in.  I was already tired of the laundry, trips to public restrooms (4 times during one movie!), the laundry, the laundry, and the laundry.  Stress level was high.  He had some success with a sticker chart.  We were on chart number two (no pun intended) and seemed to have hit a brick wall. 

On Saturday morning the two if us were watching Sesame Street, sitting on the couch.  I got up to go to the kitchen when I realized we were both sitting in a large wet spot.  Urine.  While I was removing the covers from all the couch cushions, he made a huge puddle on the tile floor just feet from the potty.  When he went to his room to get new underwear he made another puddle in his bedroom.  That's 3 puddles in 8 minutes, all within a few feet of a potty or a toliet.  I sat down on my cover-less couch.  And cried.

Thank God for good friends, and veteran moms.  My bestie called in the midst of the pee-pee chaos and had some wisdom for me.  As an outsider she was able to see what I couldn't.  This situation was stressful for mom and toddler, and there would be no training of any kind if it kept up.  She told me what I guess I knew in the back of my head...that he wasn't ready.  It didn't matter that he would be 4 soon or that other people may think it was weird or wrong for my kid to still be in pull-ups.  I needed to do what was right for my child. i was pushing him to be potty trained and he was pushing right back.

There it was.  I had a couch in disaray and two urine puddles to clean up.  I wiped away my tears of frustration, put that kid in a pull-up and fixed us some lunch.

Now it's on his terms.  He'll do it when he's ready.  I just hope he's ready soon.  I am tired of buying pull-ups!

Thank God for good friends, slipcover couches, and tile floors. 

 

Officially Summer {You Can Find Me at the River!}

Summer is officially here.  And right out the gates she's not holding anything back with it being as hot as the surface of the sun 115 degrees today.  Yes, that is one hundred fifteen.  One, One, Five.  I know, right?! But, it's a dry heat.  Like my oven.

So, when you are exiled to anywhere that's wet or air-conditioned, what kind of options do you have?  My son can only sit in a cart and walk around Wal-Mart or Target for so long, you know.  And, at $5 a pop, visiting the local aquatic complex isn't a daily option.  Oh yeah, and my backyard is about as inviting as Death Valley in July.  Dirt and the heat of a million burning suns.  Yuck.

Thank goodness God had the foresight to create a little wonder called the Colorado River a few eons ago.  It ain't glamourous, pretty, or have crystal blue waters.  But that water runs cool when I dip my feet and the price is right!

Last week the bestie and I took the kiddos to the river for some free, cool fun.  We found a little inlet with a slow current and was only ankle to knee deep.  It was the perfect spot for everyone to play, have a good time, and be water-safe.  We're going back again today.

And who doesn't love some float down action?!  Saturday marks the 2nd annual Brandi Bender Birthday Colorado River Float Down.  Whoot!  Whoot!  It'll just be me, a nice inflatable, lots of sunscreen, and 4 hours of just going with the flow! Oh yeah, and about 5-7 other people.  Good times!

So, there's my answer to beating the summer heat.  If you need me, I'll be at the river!

Random Summer Vacay-ness {and a WINNER!}

I'm nearly a week into my summer vacay and I have spent an equal amount of time busy and relaxing.  So far, David has gone to summer camp for 3 days (Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings), Momma ran around crazy doing errands on Monday morning, we did the movies on Tuesday and made a trip to the local Game and Fish Office, Momma volunteered at church on Wednesday, Thursday is the water park, and Friday will have me spending some quality time at the local Social Security office.  Do I know how to live, or what?!  I also don't want to forget to mention some good Momma and David naps, in particular the 3 hour one on Tuesday.

The rest of the summer looks to be more of the same.  Though I am hoping for less running around crazy with errands.  There for sure will be a visit to Disneyland for a mini-family reunion, some definite cooling off in the mountains, and hopefully a jaunt over to San Diego for some beach and zoo time.  Oh, how these 8 weeks will fly by!




And now, for the moment you all have been waiting for....our 5-0 Giveaway winner is....

Gin Kelsey @ Life as Topher's Mama

Yay, Gin!  Send me an email with your address, and I will be sending you your fabulous tote!

Another One Bites the Dust {and a Giveaway!}

So, my summer vacation officially began at noon yesterday.  Another school year bites the dust.

Thursday was the last day with the students, and while I really thought I was gonna make it out alive and without shedding a tear, that wasn't the case.  I had minutes to go, but when I began praying aloud before we dismissed, the floodgates opened.  After the prayer, I opened my eyes to find most of my students teary eyed themselves.  I hugged each student as they walked out the door.  Bittersweet.

On Friday, the only thing standing between me and 8 weeks of leisure time was a brief meeting and checking out of my room.  By 12:00pm both were on the books.  The end of my 10th year of teaching.  Hello, summer!

For the next short while my life will be sleeping in (6am...ugh!), flip flops, hat days, and swimming suits, all accompanied by a bright eyed and very active toddler.  Sprinkle in a few short, but action packed trips and we have ourselves a summer.  Let the fun commence!

Next order of business is a giveaway.  I'm just shy of 50 followers.  Thank you to those who read my blog!  And to show my appreciation, I want to have a giveaway when I hit the official 5-0!  One lucky winner will get this cute and sassy tote bag.  Perfect for summer!

And to make it even more interesting, I will host two more giveaways at 75 and 100 followers.  Whoot! Whoot!

So tell your friends, shout it from the mountain top, or put up a billboard.  And keep watching for the deets on the first of three giveaways.   

Anyone Other Than Me? {My Story: No Apologies}

Could I have been

A parking lot attendant

Could I have been

A millionaire in Bel Air

Could I have been Lost somewhere in Paris

Could I have been

Your little brother

Could I have been

Anyone other than me

Could I have been

Anyone other than me

Could I have been

Anyone other than me

Could I have been

Anyone

-Lyrics from Dancing Nancies Dave Matthews Band

Anyone who has known me for about 5 seconds knows I love Dave Matthews Band.  Or Dave Matthews solo.  Or Dave Matthews and Tim Reynolds.

I digress.

I was listening to my man, Dave, it was a live track, and I was rockin' out.  Singing the lyrics at the top of my lungs, out of tune, mind you, I couldn't help but think: Could I have been a millionaire in Bel Air?  Could I have been lost somewhere in Paris? Could I have been your little brother?  Obviously that last one, is not really possible, but you get the idea.  Could I have been anyone other than me?

I would really hate to think of a world without a Lauren Gross.  That would be a sad, sad place.  Luckily for all of you, that's not the case.  While I suppose I could have taken a different path in life, I would still be the same ol' me.  And, right now, I am satisfied with who I am.  I mean, with the exception of the baby weight I carry (even though I never got pregnant or gave birth) and my addiction to Coca-Cola, I am pretty awesome.

I am me.

I have a story. 

And I'm not apologizing for who I am.

I will not apologize for being a parent.  I will not apologize for how I raise my child.  Not for the choices I make with my time or my money.  Not for the choices I make as an adult, a wife, or mother.  I will not apologize for trusting in my God.  I will not apologize for having a hope because of Jesus.  Not for where I go.   Not for where my husband goes.  Not for the time we spend apart or the time we spend with our son as a family.  I will not apologize for the life I live.  I will not apologize for the things people think they know about me or my life.  I will not apologize for trying to be the best mom/wife/friend/teacher/person I can be and making a million and half mistakes while doing it.  I will not apologize for being awesome, for being lame, for being a hypocrite, for being right, for being wrong, or for being forgiven.  Because I am all of that and more.

That's me, folks.  Love it or leave it.  Really, you'll want to love it.  You won't be able to resist.

And no one knows me, my son, my husband, or my story like I know it.

And I will be the one to tell my story.       

Ahhh, 3-Day Weekend, You Are a Welcome Treat

It's been a week, to say the least.  I am really thankful for this long weekend to regroup before the final homestretch of the school year.  Did I mention there are only 7 more school days left???

For the next 3 days I am envisioning lots of time spent chasing a wild toddler, naps together, church, little to no cooking, and some late-night TV watching and crafting after Wee Man hits the hay.

Three-day weekends are just one of life's sweetest little blessings!

Hurt. Hurting.

I have no words.

Correction, I have lots of words, but there are so many and they are flying around so furiously in my head that I cannot put them together.  I feel like I'm running around with a butterfly net trying to catch these words to put them into some kind of intelligble order so I can tell my story.  The only thing I can muster the sense to say is that I am heartbroken.  Heart.  Broken.  Hurt.  Hurting.

I'm so hurt that I want to throw up.  My head feels like exploding.  My heart is as heavy as a pile of bricks.  My hands are shaking.  My eyes sting with the remains of dried tears.  Even days after I am still reeling.

How can someone say such awful things?  Such hurtful things.  Say such things with no regard, with no empathy, with no consequence.  How does one say things in the name of trying to get your attention?  Since when did getting someone's attention make horrible accusations excusable?  Things were said that no mother (or father) wants to hear.  That no mother (or father) should have to hear. 

Why did you even adopt your child?  Such words I cannot fathom someone saying with any sincerity.  Or at all.  I liken this comment to saying Why didn't you just get an abortion?

You don't invest in your child.  Such judgement I don't believe I deserve.  Such judgement I hope I have never and will never condemn upon someone. 

I have nothing to say except that I am hurt.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words have hurt me more.

2011: A Mother's Day Odyssey

It's that one day of the year in which the usual daily guilt of motherhood I typically carry has vanished and I just bask in the glory of being a momma and enjoy the gifts, the hugs, and kisses.

If it weren't for one wild and tenacious, blond-haired, blue-eyed little guy I wouldn't be able to celebrate this wonderful day.  Thank you, David, for making me a momma.

In honor of Mother's Day, here is a short list of some of the ways in which my life would be very different if I weren't elbow deep in motherhood....

I would never have to trip over toys, dodge nerf bullets, or change poppy diapers.

I would never have to wake-up in the middle of the night to let someone into my bed, or get up to comfort someone's tears after a bad dream.

I would never have to endure a temper tantrum when it's time to clean up/eat dinner/take a bath/go home.

I would never have to spend a small fortune every month on pull-ups and baby wipes because my boy won't use the potty.

I would never get the sweet hugs and kisses each morning from a sleepy little boy.

I would never hear, "I love you, mommy," or "Watch this, mom," or "Mommy, I need you,", or "Will you cuddle me?"

I would never have the not-so-great days of raising a toddler or the wonderful days of mommahood.

I would never endure Mother's guilt.

I would never get to kiss boo-boos or cradle a hurt or sick kiddo.

I would never get to experience the zoo/Sea World/Disneyland through the eyes of a child.

I would never get to push a swing or meet a smiling face at the end of a slide.

I would never have to plan a super awesome birthday party.

I would never love until it hurts.

My life would not be the same.

Thank you, David.  Thank you, God.

God's Plan for My Shark Steam Mop

I try not to take lightly the subject of God's plan or will for my life.  Though my thoughts and actions do not always follow reflect it accordingly, I trust Him.  I know He has a plan and purpose for my life.

So, it is no surprise that when several months ago I was called by His Divine Authority to purchase a Shark Steam Mop I followed God's calling.  Who am I to get in the way of the will of God, anyways? 

My Shark Steam Mop sat unused for a long time.  God's specific plan for the use of said mop had not been revealed to me.  In other words, I was just too lazy to get it out and mop my floors.  (Please don't judge me for having dirty floors.  I have a cleaning lady.  Please don't judge me for having a cleaning lady, either).

It was a beautiful spring day when God would finally call me to the ministry of the Shark.  I didn't really see it coming.  But that's God for ya.  He doesn't usually say, "Hey, Lauren!  On April 11, 2011, at approximately 4:30pm, I'm gonna call you to do something."  I wish He did that.

When I walked in my front door, I was met with a really unpleasant smell.  It was bad, but I couldn't put my finger on it.  My son found the source.  He had gone to the laundry room to let the dog out and began yelling, "Mommy, Sarah has poopy! Sarah has poopy!"  Ah, that's the smell.  And lo and behold, there was poopy.  Poopies.  Plural.  Many small piles, actually puddles, of doggy diarrhea strewn across 50 square feet of tile.  Thankfully it was tile.

I'm sure you can figure out the rest:  I wipe it up, then steam mop the heck out of the floor.  I steam mopped like I had never steam mopped before.  And, actually, I hadn't ever steam mopped before.  It was the Shark's maiden voyage.  I'm guessing the Shark would have preferred a more glamorous first run, but, that's the breaks.

The Doggy Diarrhea Disaster of Spring 2011 could not have been a better time for God to reveal His plan for my life, and for my Shark Steam Mop.  I am so thankful for my God and for His calling me to buy that Shark Steam Mop.  Hallelujah!

P.S. - This is not my first run-in with poop, canine or otherwise.  If you are so inclined to read more about my excrement adventures read here, here, here and here.

 

Worry Not, My Dear One

Convicted.

That's what I was feeling.

You see, I had just been thinking earlier in the day that God was teaching me something through this.  At that time I wasn't aware of his objective for the lesson.  Objective now duly noted.

My current season in life is marked by incredible difficulty with my child.  I'm talking the kind of difficulty in which I question my decision to become a mother.  The type of difficulty in which I do not currently enjoy my role as a mom or enjoy spending time with my child. (Condemnation, harsh criticism, and judgement aside, please). I LOVE my child.  Adore him.  Am blessed to have him.  However, all of that doesn't make my job any easier right now. 

My heart is broken.  My head is spinning.  My body is tired.  My resolve is gone.  My patience is worn thin.  I spend my days fretting.  Worrying.  What-if-ing.  I'm scared that the present behavior problems may get worse.  What if he never stops doing _____________?  Could he end up in jail when he gets older?  What further issues could he have?  Rational or not, these are my thoughts and concerns.

But, is this worrying going to change the outcome of my son's life?  Simple answer...No.  I am consumed with the future when I need to be present in the present.  I am forgetting that my God is big.  I am ignoring the fact that my life, and his little life are in God's hands.  I am refusing to seek counsel from the very place I want counsel.  I am trying to stand on my own two feet and my own understanding.  I am discounting that I cannot do this parenting thing without help from my Savior.  I am neglecting to remember that God put this child in my care for a purpose.  I am not acknowledging that this child, my child, is God's baby, too.  I have disregarded the promises of His word that say,

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it. (Proverbs 22:6)

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)

Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? (Matthew 6:27)

For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground; I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants.  (Isaiah 44:3)

But when He had set me apart before I was born...and had called me through His grace. (Galatians 1:15)

As I take heart in knowing that God is in charge, that God is my helper, that God is my strength and my shield, I am turning these matters over to Him.  I will lay hands on my son and lift him up in prayer...constantly.  I will seek peace, guidance, and wisdom from my King.  I will walk in His grace knowing that my future, and my son's, belong to Him.

I hear God saying, Worry not, my child.  I love you.

Back to Reality: Spring Break in Review

Well, my days of sleeping in waking up at 5:30am and tending to the every need of my 2nd graders toddler are over.  My break wasn't exactly a dream vacation.  I was still up early each day and seemed to be working jut as hard as I do during school, but it was nice to get away from the classroom, grading papers, and preparing lessons for just a bit.  Only 9 weeks until summer vacation!

Here is my spring break in pictures.  Sorry, no carcass display, though.

Jumping on the couch. 

Cartoons and his morning cup o' soy milk.

A little soccer ball action in the front yard.

Helping Daddy use power tools. 



Attempting to climb into the pig's pen.



Getting sniffed in the rear by a steer.

A whole lotta kids!

Hula-hooping

More games at the fair.

Bathtime.  Wearing a hat.  Makes sense.

What didn't get captured in photographs was Gramma and Grampa's visit from Las Vegas, the Quartermaster Depot, lots of eating out, the dog's haircut, a visit from the plumber, a handful of miscellaneous errands and shopping, and an all around tired momma.  Did I mention there is only 9 more weeks until summer vacation?!


Back to reality today.

Thank God for His Grace

Source:  Google Images

Even when you don't give birth to your child, they still don't come with instruction manuals.  And there's no Raising David for Dummies book at Barnes & Noble.  I've checked.

It's been a rough week or so at Casa de Gross.  I hate to say it, but in an effort to be transparent on this blog, here it goes...David has been politely asked to be un-enrolled from his second preschool.  Yes, my 3yo has been expelled.  Long story short...he's aggressive.

Not being child psychologists or mind readers, we believe there to be a lot of contributing factors.  Regardless, we need a few things during this time:  a child care solution for David, to get the aggressive behaviors in check, and, most importantly, a huge dose of God's grace.  Thankfully, the latter is given.  Abundantly.  And, also thankfully, God has provided a child care solution for the remainder of the school year.  In the meantime, we are working on David's aggressive behaviors.  And praying for grace and wisdom for us, and for grace and peace for David. 

I have had many emotions during this chaotic and emotionally trying time.  I've bounced between guilt, peace, overwhelming worry, and every feeling in between.  I can (and have) second guess every decision I've made as a mom, but that will change nothing and only wastes time and energy.  Moving forward and trusting in God is the sole choice that I can make for me, for my family, for my son.  Grace gave us our son.  Grace will help us to raise him.

Thank God for grace.

Whatever My Lot

Whatever my lot,

Thou has taught me to say,

It is well, it is well, with my soul

-Horatio Spafford

Two years this March I discovered I was pregnant.  It came as a complete shock to my husband and I.  It's not like we were trying, but we certainly weren't doing anything to prevent it.

You see, about a year after we got married we began actively pursuing a pregnancy, if you know what I mean.  Nothing happened.  For 5 years.  Until March 2009.

We were caught off guard by the news because we had been preoccuppied with our first baby.  David was a foster child that had been with us a year.  Since then we have been blessed to become his adoptive parents, but at the time, we were neck deep in the parenting thing for the first time.

Once the shock wore off we were more than thrilled.  It was what we had wanted for so long.  Not only were we enjoying being parents to David, less than 18 months old, we were looking forward to expanding our family with a biological child.  

In 10 short weeks I had to endure the routine blood tests and exams, but also (WARNING: TMI ALERT!) two transvaginal ultrasounds.  The normal type of ultrasounds that happen in the OBGYN's office weren't doing the trick.  Nope.  I had to make a special trip to a lab with a referral from my doc.  They were looking for something.  A heartbeat.  Something normal.  Something abnormal.  Something.

It was 10 weeks.  The lab results were in.  There was a fetus, but it wasn't viable.  The baby I wanted so badly was gone.  Because I had gotten my second ultrasound on a  Friday afternoon, my doc had the results rushed and he was kind enough to call me at home after hours to tell me the news.  

I never sobbed so hard.  I never hurt so much.  My heart was broken.  I was broken.

After 2 years I still hurt sometimes.  But what I know is that my God is good and He has blessed me abundantly:  I have my husband, my son, and my Savior who has redeemed me and made me whole.  I rest in the peace, strength, and grace of God to sustain me in my times of heartbreak.  For whatever my lot, it is well with my soul. 

Blessed Be Your Name

In the land that is plentiful

Where Your streams of abundance flow

Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

"Blessed Be Your Name" - Matt Redman

Heartbreaking Moments of Motherhood

On Monday David underwent circumcision surgery.  He's a bit over 3 years old now, so the most common question is Why?  David came into our home at 4 months old through foster care and we were blessed to adopt him when he turned 2 (you can read about our story here, here and here).

You see, circumcision is an elective surgery, and for his birth parents, being gainfully unemployed and on state health insurance, this procedure was not going to be covered.  They were in no position to pay for it out of their pockets.  Well, when David was less than a year old he got 2 urinary tract infections and then recently he had another infection on his penis at the foreskin and had to be taken to the ER.  It was there that we discovered, not only the infection, but that he had a chronic condition in which the foreskin was too tight.  It became medically necessary for David to be circumcised. 

Fast forward to Monday, February 21st.  It was David Day.  Surgery was not the way any of us wanted to spend this special day.  We had to wake up VERY early to drive to Mesa, AZ, for the outpatient surgery.  We checked in, registered, and got David dressed in a tiny hospital gown.  It was then that a nurse we all just met came to take my unassuming son away.  He cried.  I mean CRIED.  A stranger was taking him, dressed in strange clothing, away from his parents and he didn't know why.  Then he would go into a room with other strangers where they would put a mask on him and do other things and he didn't know why.  I watched him being carreid away from me, crying and calling for me as I walked towards the lobby where I was to wait.  I choked back tears and thought of my poor boy being scared and lonely.  First heartbreaker of the day.

It didn't take long and we were finally called into Recovery to see our boy.  Andrew and I were escorted into a room with a recliner.  I sat there and a nurse brought my sweet child to me all bundled up and fresh from surgery,  He was still out of it from anesthesia and couldn't walk because of the caudal (a type of epidural).  I choked back tears again as I was still scared for him and what he was feeling post-surgery and for the relief I felt being able to hold him again.  Another heartbreaking moment.

Thankfully our long drive home immediately after the surgery was without any problems or complications.  But, once we got home, and as the anesthesia was wearing off, the pain got worse.  He cried and moaned.  There was nothing I could do for him.  Third heartbreak of the day.

No one said being a mom was easy.  It sure isn't.  And there is nothing worse than witnessing your child in pain and not being able to help.  Poor boy.  I hope he heals soon.  Very. Soon.

There's No Competition

It's no secret that I am a working mom.  Being a stay at home mom is just not my reailty right now.  I have friends in both categories, working and staying at home.  And, it has been things I have heard or read recently that have gotten me a thinkin'...

Are we moms competing?  Is there some Working Moms vs. Stay at Home Moms war going on reminiscent of East Coast vs. West Coast Rappers?  Aren't we all Women, Moms, Sisters of the Brotherhood, or should I say Motherhood?

I dislike hearing moms on both sides claiming their jobs as a WM or SAHM are harder.  Why does it have to be harder or easier or better or whatever-er?  Can't we just say DIFFERENT and call it a day?

Let's start supporting each other in our adventures instead of comparing.  Being a mom is hard enough, working, at home, or what-have-you.  Let's not pull the I work harder cards, ladies.  Don't complicate what's already complicated enough: Motherhood.

I say MOTHERS UNITE!  Who's with me??

(Stepping down from soap box)

Three Years Ago Today...

A little blue-eyed, blond-haired bundle of chubby baby-ness came into our home for the first time.  Nothing has been the same ever since.



Then: February 2008

Now: January 2011


Happy David Day!